BOIS NEWSLETTER (Week 9)

7 min readNov 2, 2023

(November 2nd 2023)

Helllllooooooo Everybodyyyyy,

I am back and boy am I ready to talk some football. This season has been a tougher one for me as extenuating circumstances have led to me missing more games than I would like. So, I suppose that means I will not be throwing out takes with the same absolute certainty I usually possess. But hey, throwing out takes without actually watching ball has never stopped Joe or Matt S., so I might as well get into it.

I think this week needs to be about endings. Not nearly as exciting as beginnings but MUCH more important. For example, Kirk Cousins's career most likely ENDED this week on the cold Lambeau turf. Joe’s time gallivanting around with his friends on boys' trips is going to end (hopefully for Rachel’s sake) in February, and most importantly the narrative that Brock Purdy is actually a good QB, dissipated with 3rd consecutive loss in which his Fraudulent meter levels were off the charts. As we reflect on these endings, I will take the time to point out what endings each of you needs to embrace.

As we transition into this season of winter and the ending of daylight and the endorphins the warmth provides, let's get into it!

Power Rankings

1. 40k Magic (6–2)

(Previous 2.)

It’s time for us to end the narrative that Matt has this unstoppable team. Is he good? Yes. Is his team most likely to win it all? Most likely. But is he this juggernaut that can't be beaten? Hell no. He has lost the past 2 weeks in a row and one of those losses was to ALEX. This is an “Any Given Week” league and we should all be ready to give Matt that work. However, Tyreek is scary and Kamara’s role in the Saint’s offense is even scarier, so I will still give my respect to our favorite thespian. But if he loses this week….

2. Ozark’s Revenge(6–2)

(Previous 5.)

We might have already ended this narrative, but just in case, I guess we can no longer clown Andrew for a seemingly bad team. His RBs looked so bad a few weeks ago, but with the emergence of Pacheco he is now in a much better spot. Here I must once again pay my respect to Andrew as he has now year in and year out had a top 3 team in our league. Andrew is my friend and I am proud of him but he is also my rival so I hate him and his memes.

3. Sphace(5–3)

(Previous 4.)

I think Seth is the perfect person to help end the idea that you have to know ball to be good at fantasy football. With an hour or 2 of RedZone sandwiched by church potlucks and 15-mile runs, Seth relies on ESPN fantasy write-ups and the grace of God to field one of the best teams in our league. Will this continue every year? Probably not… We all saw his team last year… but for this year (the only year that matters really) Seth is flying closer and closer to that proverbial promised land.

4. Le Petite Prince (4–4)

(Previous 1.)

It is with great sadness that I must end my now obviously incorrect assumption that I would once again dominate the league. Things were looking so promising, but some bad luck, some poor WR performances, and just maybe a team that is not as dominant as I presumed has resulted in me being in the same tier as Luke and Alex. But fear not fellow league members, I will be making a push here down the stretch as my abundance of quality WRs (WR 1 strategy) will not fail me every week. I will see you all in the playoffs.

Respectfully F*ck Calvin Ridley and Press Taylor

5. You Just Got Cammed(4–4)

(Previous 3.)

Arthur Smith is making sure to end the possible dominance of Cam’s RBs. With Breece Hall and Tony Pollard both being relatively solid, Bijan SHOULD be the icing on the cake propelling Cam to the top of our league, but instead, the Falcons, as always, are gonna be whack and decide to not give the ball to their good players (Shoutout Kyle Pitts). So now Cam must try to scrape by with a “could be” elite RB group and a certainly not elite group of receivers. If he doesn't make the playoffs this year, the elite RB room might not be the only thing that’s ending.

6. Alex (4–4)

(Previous 7.)

I think that we can end the narrative that Alex is bad at fantasy football. Despite the 2 years of evidence that demonstrated his fantasy ineptitude, this year Alex has turned in my opinion his worst draft into a team that is challenging for that final playoff spot. It’s wild that he is .500 with Deandre Hopkins in the year of our Lord 2023 as one of his best receivers and his top pick getting looked off by Jimmy G every week. This man has to look at Najee Harris on the bench EVERY TIME he opens the Fantasy app. Kudus to you my friend, you are making your 10 minutes a week count.

7. Panda Express(4–4)

(Previous 10.)

IT IS TIME TO END THE CALLS THAT LUKE NEEDS TO BE KICKED OUT OF OUR LEAGUE. Lil Luke has been the biggest surprise of the season in my opinion. Well-timed memes, good insights when we are debating the waiver wire, and a team that is competitive. That’s more than most of you offer to be fair, so let's all pay our respects to the taller Hartsfield even if he never acknowledged my wedding gift… I guess that Luke’s past interactions with fish might indicate he isn't actually using this thing though to be fair.

8. Sauce Boss (3–5)

(Previous 6.)

This is a Joe-specific ending. I think you need to end ANY thoughts that your team is good. You tried your best and that is all that really matters, but the dream of ending the season on a heater is over. Sometimes drafting Kupp as number one overall coming off an injury on a bad offense can really hurt us. You're kind of like your hero Brock Purdy, early season hype before reality came crashing down. But hey you got Gibbs locked and loaded as a keeper next year.

9. Bye Week (3–5)

(Previous 8.)

I am just sending out my thoughts and prayers that Matt is not thinking about ending anything himself. Hopefully, Cameron Dicker was able to erase the ghosts of our matchup last year (never forget negative points from his kicker), and Matt can turn that win into some much-needed momentum with Jonathan Taylor and company seemingly ready to be decent.

10. Al’s Chicken (1–7)

(Previous 9.)

I think we can officially end the chances that Big Al could make the playoffs. Despite another solid performance this past week, he lost again thanks to a single Jakobi Meyers reception. Although this season is following the path of the 2 before, one thing that is not ending is how proud I am of Allen for actually managing his team well this year. Atta boy.

BENCH BLUES:

The best performers from each week that had the privilege to rack up their points while on someone’s bench.

1. ALLEN — Amari Cooper: 14.9 points | Who played instead: Courtland Sutton: 10.9 points

This could have been a big win for Big Al if he simply started the second-best receiver on his roster. But instead another tough loss. Damn.

2. MATT O. Dropping the Cowboys Defense

I can't believe he dropped the best fantasy defense in the league for no reason. I know Andrew isn't complaining.

Week 9 Matchup to Watch

Panda Express(4–4) vs. You Just Got Cammed(4–4)

Here we have a matchup of 2 teams that seem like they are on completely different levels yet they are both 4–4, trying to steal that 4th playoff spot from me. Whoever wins this matchup is going to be in great shape going into the stretch run. Cam sonned Luke by 60 points in Week 1, but I think Luke steals this one behind big games from Brian Robinson and Jakobi Meyers in a new-look Raiders offense. Cam says “me baby”. How could he not? Matt replies with an enthusiastic “Cam”.

MEMES